Ask Beastly: I Have a Werewolf Fetish—How Do I Make It Real?

How to turn a furry fantasy into real play.

Hi Beastly,

So, for some context, I'm in a long-term open relationship with my husband, we play together but also play separately because we have different sexual preferences that the other isn't into. This is a great arrangement that has worked for years, but it's actually one of my kinks that I'm writing to you about today.

I have a huge werewolf fetish, particularly the idea of transforming into a werewolf. I've been aroused by it for as long as I can remember, and a lot of my sexual alone time is spent consuming werewolf-related erotica or fantasizing about it.

Lately, I've wanted to try to incorporate this kink into sex with other guys, but I have no idea how to go about it. I've told my partner about it, and he's super supportive, but I know he's not into it himself and isn't as kinky as I, so I don't think he'd be up for trying it in the bedroom.

That leaves finding playmates who share or would be willing to indulge my fetish, but I have no idea how to bring it up, where to look for them, or even really how to realise my kink in the bedroom, given it's quite literally a fantasy.

Any advice on how to make this kinky werewolf pup’s dreams a reality would be appreciated. Thanks Beastly! Love the blog and hope you have a great and sexy day.

Heyo!

It has been a while since a question surprised me, but yours did. Since all fetish roleplay is fantasy—roleplaying as, say, a sadistic doctor and helpless patient is no different from roleplaying as a werewolf and its victim—you’ll find playmates the same way any other kinkster (kinky person, for those who don’t know) with a niche fetish finds playmates. Which means: not without some substantial effort.

It might not be easy, but I think finding roleplay partners is challenging for most kinksters, regardless of what they’re into. If you have an unusual fantasy or fetish scenario in mind, it can take years to find someone who wants to do that. This is why I encourage kinksters to maintain a broad palette of interests and kinks. But sometimes you just want something particular and are determined to get it.

And that takes work.

Finding the right person might require chatting with lots of strangers on the internet until one of them catches your eye. Then you might switch to phone or video calls, and at some point, you might hop on a plane. Or you might require an adventurous, playful sex worker. Or, depending on what your dirty dream is, you might just need to spend a lot of time on apps like Recon. Finding someone who shares your kink undoubtedly means travelling to in-person fetish events like Folsom in San Francisco, Folsom Europe, and so on. You may need to advertise yourself, both in person and online, as someone interested in werewolf play.

You can expect questions, puzzled looks, and probably some judgment. It takes bravery to be into anything niche, even in spaces that are supposed to be welcoming to everyone. I often think the cosplay kids and furries are the bravest among us, along with the shit pigs and bug chasers, because they commonly encounter judgement even in kink spaces that purport to be safe from judgment. If you walk into a leather event announcing your interest in werewolf roleplay, you will be the “werewolf guy.” People will talk. And that may be precisely what you need to do to find a great playmate.

So be brave. Own what you like.

Once you find someone interested in the idea of werewolf play, you have to present to them a rough sketch of what that scenario looks like. You'll need to do this so you can have something to talk about. If “werewolf play” for you means wearing dog-like hoods and masks, roughhousing, gentle biting, and a “transformation” scene in which the victim becomes a werewolf too (which can mean putting on a similar dog-like hood or just howling and acting wolf-life on all fours), that’s what you should say. Be open to their changes, additions, limits, and so on.

If your idealized “werewolf play” involves other fetish practices, including anal sex—if it involves, say, some BDSM—say that too. Create a rough idea of the experience you want and see how potential playmates respond. Ultimately, the experience that unfolds will be a collaborative effort between you and the person you find, with limits and boundaries mutually agreed upon by both of you. Always be open to their changes and, of course, always be respectful of their limits and only play with people who are respectful of yours.

It can be helpful to find the established fetish scenes that “touch”—come close to—werewolf play. The pup scene comes to mind, but if your idea of werewolf play involves domination or ass play, that might be your better window into finding someone. What I mean by that is: It might be easier to find someone willing to try a werewolf scenario if it involves kinks that have larger fans and are a bit more common. I don’t imagine a werewolf scene involves fisting, but if your version of it does, I would tell you to cast your net among fisters, who (from my experience) will try anything weird and wild.

I can’t dictate what a werewolf scene involves to you because I don’t know exactly what scenario plays in your mind when you think about werewolves. I don’t know what part or parts of it turn you on, so I can’t write the playbook. Only you can.

Though the inspiration for it is fantasy—werewolves do not, in fact, exist—you must ground the werewolf playbook in the real world, in safe and consensual things you can do, and build it from the sex practices that are already established in kink while tweaking them so that they tickle the fantasy in your mind. That’s how anyone builds a livable erotic scenario from a hot, dirty dream.

Love, Beastly